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Hey there Mari0O07, Nice Story, I just have a few comments to make. I think you need to focus a little more when you're writing because there were things that ...

Hey Siera, First of all I think you write very well for someone as young as yourself :) I was impressed. I loved the idea. Not just is this gladiator ...

Oh no is that the end? :( I loved both parts of this story. Like I said in my last post, you kept my attention the entire time! You have ...

The beginning of this story was great. I really liked the idea that global warming eventually eradicates the seasons and humans are confronted with the reality that it's too dangerous ...

I'd really like to hear more about this story - more about the girl's background and what happened to her parents. It sounds juicy :) I would go back and ...

This almost bought tears to my eyes. The concept is brilliant - here are two girls that he had once loved, and he had to choose between killing one or ...

I like the story. I'm going to assume though that English is not your usual language?? Please don't take this the wrong way -it's just that some of the words ...

Hey there, I like the concept of your story - it shows great potential. I think the others have commented a bit on things that you could touch up on ...

You always come up with such cool ideas for short stories, they're so much fun :) I love the way you write. It's so easy for the reader to immerse ...

Hey Wolfpaws! I think the other two comments pretty much cover what you need to work on. I just wanted to say though - at the beginning you said " ...

I absolutely loved this. I'm so excited at the prospect of reading more. Pleeease keep writing, I beg you. If this were a book I would buy it. Keep up ...

The Troll sounds vile. Just as I would expect a troll to be :) The description was good, I had no problems with visualising the creature, but maybe you could ...

I felt the emotions in this piece were slightly confusing. They were constantly changing. At first the night is mocking her, I would take this to be a negative thing. ...

In response to your feedback 'PhoenixBishop', I believe when Adalia is referred to as "the fairest in the land" it is regarding her appearance, not her nature. That was my ...

Oh wow - WHAT a cool concept :) It's so nice to read something creative and original for a change. This story kept my attention the entire time. Well done ...