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322sivart

  • General Fiction Novels Re: Sam I Am (Prologue)

    Hi Mikko, sorry I took kind of a long time to get back to this. As requested, here are some of the spelling mistakes/other errors I noticed: I rushed out ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Narrative Poetry Re: Bittersweet December

    The first thing that I observe when I read this poem is that unlike much of the dramatic poetry that I read, your poem rhymes. I also think that you ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • General Fiction Novels Re: Breathe (1)

    I thought this was interesting, and I would like to see where this story goes. The flow and pace of the story were good, and so was the character development. ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Fantasy Novels Re: The Cave Between Lands, Chapter One

    I have to say that the reason why this chapter of your story is incredible in particular is because it can really go in any direction it likes. I love ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Narrative Poetry Re: Deleted

    I really like this. One major observation of mine is that I can't tell if you deliberately wanted to rhyme in some places and then didn't in others. I'm assuming ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • Romantic Novels Re: Watch Out - chapter 1

    I really like this. For a story such as this, I think that a first person point of view is essential, so I'm glad you made it that way. You ...

    Feb 12, 2011
  • General Fiction Novels Re: Sam I Am (Prologue)

    While reading this, I am confused about many things. I don't know what kind of audience you are writing for. The fact that you censored the word "piss" makes me ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: If I ever,

    This is great, I love it! Just as IcyFlame said, I have never been a fan of sad romantic poetry, but I really love this. There are really no productive ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Romeo and Juliet

    I really liked it. But as someone has mentioned before me, it's difficult to figure out where to put the stress on each line. I have never read the story ...

    Feb 11, 2011
  • WRFF Archive Re: The Angel is Busy Fighting a Heavenly War as of Now *closed*

    Hi Persephonia, I know you said you don't like novels, but if you get around to it, could you review this? Thanks in advance, -Alex

    Feb 10, 2011
  • Other Poetry Re: Nothing Rhymes With Purple

    Wow. Amazing and origional; other people that commented before me really said it all, but i love it nevertheless! It really doesn't seem like this is your first poem written ...

    Feb 10, 2011
  • Narrative Poetry Re: A broken heart heals nothing

    First off, it was very choppy and it would've been a much better read had this been formatted as a poem, not a paragraph. Even knowing the significance of your ...

    Feb 10, 2011
  • Romantic Novels Re: Valentine's is coming up......

    I could help, but I don't really know what you want to write. Any guidelines?

    Feb 10, 2011
  • Other Poetry Re: Dear Star

    I really like this. I'm a fan of this unorganized formal, and sometimes I write poetry like this. Just some nit-picks Star light, star bright. You are The first star ...

    Feb 10, 2011
  • Other Poetry Re: Nike - acrostic poem

    I'm a big fan of acrostic poetry, so I love this. The only real suggestion that I can give you is one that shiney1 already gave to you, is that ...

    Feb 10, 2011


You sound like you're becoming emotionally involved with the custard.
— Nikki Morgan