Aiva

:smt010 It's so sad. Like Gyr said, you're a very sophisticated writer, and I enjoyed this piece a lot. Just like everyone else said, it's a bit redundant at parts, ...

Thanks for all the CC, it's very much appreciated!! This is still in the editing process. In fact, the second piece is my second draft, and I'm probably going to ...

Even worse 2-draft prologue!! Eep. Hopefully, you'll like my new one better... Sorry for the inconvenience, everyone!! And thanks for the input, it's given me some great ideas about my ...

Ahh, thank you!! Yeah, the prologue is more of an info-dumpy thing than a "start of the adventure!!" prologue, which is in chapter one. So basically, cut a few things, ...

Sounds good! I'll post the revised one again. IS a bit short. I noticed that when I was posting, the second verse was REALLY tiny. =D Thanks for the input!

........Crap. She does?? Great... Yeah, I do that a lot. Hopefully, it'll change over time, and my writing will get better...>.

Okay, here we go. This poem has more of a basic topic, so it stays on track better than my other one did...I hope. I haven't given it a title ...

Ahh! I'm so happy. Thank you so much for critting my story!! Actually, this is going to be a full length novel (guess I should have said that earlier...), so ...

Augh!! My first story critique!! I'm so happy!! Yeah, see, I wasn't quite sure if it sounded more like a first chapter than a prologue...Thanks for clearing it up! The ...

I love this story!! But, just like everyone else said, the ending was a bit confusing, and maybe even a bit abrupt?? But that's what makes it so good, so ...

You've got an interesting take on it, I'll give you that... But, yeah, I see what you're saying...I think... :? Heh. Thanks for taking the time to read it!

This is a cool song! It puts a whole new meaning to MIA! But I don’t, no – And that needs to change! [quote] I read that, and thought the ...

Yeah, I completely get what your saying. My focus when it comes to poems and songs varies a LOT. I get off topic....Hehe. Yeah, I meant to put quotes around ...

Okey-dokey, I have officially finished my new, remastered prologue, so this prologue shall never be heard again, and shall reside forever more on the back of my mind!!! ....Um.....So, yeah...

That's interesting. It's got a nice ring to it. In the drafting stage, I'd say you're pretty well off. It's got some great potential. Maybe try changing some lines around. ...