Celdover

Hello. I'll be honest, this piece has left me confused about what tone you tried to convey. On one hand I see many grammatical errors, common character archetypes, and an ...

Hello. To be honest I'm not very impressed with this, but looking beyond the flaws I see some potential for this story provided you are willing to work hard. So ...

Hello there! I really enjoyed this piece since this is a situation I easily relate to, not only with school but with any situation where I'm feeling anxious. Just like ...

Hello there! A little nitpick before I begin. "Mortuus sum" roughly translates to "I am a corpse" or "I am the dead." Now this next one may not be grammatically ...

Hello there. Let me start with what speaks to me most about this work, and that's how wooden the prose and description is. Now I don't mean wooden as in ...

Hello. The very first thing that jumps out at me is the fact that you like to use commas. Perhaps a bit too much, in fact. There is more than ...

Hey there! Welcome to the site! I'm Dover and I'll be reviewing your work today. But before I get to that a rule of thumb when it comes to figuring ...

The first thing that jumps out at me is how dull this piece is. Now I'm confident that you were attempting to go for a dull and bleak environment considering ...

Hello there! I'm Dover and I shall be reviewing you today. I like how you did your best to capture the feel of the outdoors, but I feel like that ...

Hi there! I'm Dover and I shall be reviewing you today. The first thing that struck me about this piece was its vagueness. Who are these gladiators? The man? The ...

Hey there! I am going to agree with everything leebass said before. The lines about the cellphones and the birds was my favorite part, and I also agree that the ...

Hello there! I really enjoyed this lighthearted piece. It's short and sweet and reminded me of a few instances where some of my teachers got angry at their G.P.S.s for ...

Hello there. I shall be reviewing you today. (: I'd like to start off with that there's nothing enormous that jumped out at me technically speaking. The choice of vocabulary ...

Hello there. To be honest, this really didn't draw me in to your story. It rambles quite a lot on a philosophical question and giving exposition all the while. We're ...

Also reviewing a bit of chapter two in this one. I take it you'll be consistent with only changing viewpoints at each chapter? If so, then your viewpoint shifting is ...