ElizaW

Images of flowing beer and beautiful women flashed behind his closed eyes, clueing him into as to why he felt so sick. I don't mind this line, but I wish ...

I really like the idea, but I wish that this idea had more publicity. Right now the page is something of a barren wasteland.

First off, I like the way you've draped her hair over her shoulders, and given the anime-esc style her eyes look very nice. Her right shoulder, since the arm is ...

I’ll start off with the things that I liked. The plot ideas and the set up are great, and the ending was a really and surprise, since I spent most ...

Blue Crystal Chapter One: Vastii in Black (part iii) Rated PG-13 for violence (Or go to Chapter One (part i) to read from the beginning) Above the caves of the ...

Blue Crystal Chapter One: Vastii in Black (part ii) Rated PG-13 for violence (Or go to Chapter One (part i) to read from the beginning) The caves curved and turned, ...

First, my two cents (also known as ‘the only thing that bothered me reading through this’): What in the name of hell had happened to him? Right then he should ...

Just looking for some comments before I finish this.

Near the beginning: 'on a mission of war' seems very vague. If there was a war going on, wouldn't he name it specifically? And why would the innkeeper hint about ...

For critique, two parts stood out to me in this piece. When Erik, Valery, and Brad start talking, I wanted just a little more description than first, second, and third ...

Blue Crystal Chapter One: Vastii in Black (part i) The scene was illuminated by Rylan’s glass-and-bronze lamp, which shed a steady orange glow interrupted only by the framing of the ...

Overall, I liked the beginning. You have a good writing voice, though I did find a few things to nitpick. The topic changed suddenly in the beginning of the conversation; ...

I actually rather liked this story. The prose is easy to read, the narrative is smooth, and I don't have any problems following it. You have a nice style. The ...

Salve Jenny! I'm just tickled that someone else happens to study Latin. Good luck, and have fun!

So I've done a bit of a look around, and as far as I can see new people make their debut posting a couple times a day on this thread. ...