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  • Short Story » General, General Re: Victims of Violence

    Thanks for the advice folks. I'll sort it out to make it less confudling. Thanks again

    Oct 26, 2005
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Victims of Violence

    I've changed the "he" to "my stepfather" that should sort it. I've never read a book called "a child called it" who wrote it?

    Oct 25, 2005
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Victims of Violence

    ??? the headmaster didn't kill anybody, he simply got Johnny refered to Social Services and his stepfather went to jail. No one died.

    Oct 25, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Apprentice One

    OK, English homework done Nothing wrong with the idea or the story as far as i can tell, flows really well, but something needs to happen, as Griffin said or ...

    Oct 21, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Apprentice One

    I think someone would claim copyright to that idea Griff. I'll be back to critic this soon, just after i've finished my English homework...

    Oct 13, 2005
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: The Classics- Recommendations

    darn it, Peter Pan was published in 1911, so if you wait 6 years you could do a report on it then, The Three Musketeers was first published in 1844.

    Aug 30, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Prologue to The Lady Spy

    No, dont edit it, i just thought it was strange thats all, that a Male would think the character was male, and the female would think it was a female.

    Aug 5, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Prologue to The Lady Spy

    Thanks for the advice, thats really useful as i dont normaly write Prologue's so i'll take the advice to heart. I'll most likely change the bit about depth charges, it ...

    Aug 4, 2005
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: Deadly Doses

    When i first got Deadly Doses, when ever my parents annoyed me, i used to go get it and read it, saying aloud some interesting symptoms.... Anyway 1) Scene of ...

    Aug 2, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Hamstring's First Birthday

    Miss thankyou. but dont worry, your not the first to make that mistake.

    Jul 26, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Daughter of Kalmonder - Chapter 2

    IT WORKED!!!! *jumps up and hugs Snoink* Thats been bugging me for ages, thank you!! We have Italics!

    Jul 18, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Fantasy Writer: Chapter One

    I think Snoink caught all the error's. I enjoyed reading it and it made me giggle at some points, it appealed to my sence of humour. This is going somewhere, ...

    Jul 17, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Daughter of Kalmonder - Chapter 2

    *hurriedly feels forehead for trance of fever* no grammer mistakes? wow, thats rare, im gonna edit now and little green lines will pop up everywere. Thanks for the critic Eloere, ...

    Jul 17, 2005
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Daughter of Kalmonder - Chapter 2

    Sorry the italics are not working, again...

    Jul 3, 2005
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Ann Ross ( a Cinderella Story) II

    This is very Cinderella and Little Princess, but i like it. It's a happy ending "awwww" type thingy with an extra twist at the end, Cinderella being real. Its another ...

    Jun 30, 2005


I'll make sure nobody unauthorized runs off with the chamber pot, sir.
— Kaladin (Words of Radiance by Brandon Sanderson)