Gabe.L

This is cute, I'm not sure if its trying to be anything more than cute, but I hope not because I quite like it the way it is. As for ...

This was a fine poem the first time I read it, but I felt I was missing something so I went over it a few more times. I'm glad to ...

This is quite entertaining to read, and I love the almost cinematic formate that you used for writing this story. For the most part it is very well written and ...

This was an interesting piece. You have a voice that as, mentioned above, seems to be emulating a traditional voice, however frequent awkward phrases seems to make it less powerful. ...

This was a nice poem! With that said, peaceful as can be, but none the less, I found a dress as black as black can be. It does not flow ...

This was obviously a very personal piece. For the most part you do a very fine job of portraying a dark tone. However, with the typos and awkwardly phrased lines, ...

this is very nice. There is something kind of dreary image in this poem, I think its partly because your word choice was fantastic. Each three or four letter line ...

This is really powerful. Often when people write poems along these lines they turn out rather corny, this poem was obviously very well thought out, very meaningful and absolutely not ...

I see that you plan on making corrections to this, which are very needed. Other that the basic corrections, I think you also need to do some serious revising to ...

This is a really nice piece, I think you use very graceful language, I especially love the first stanza, although all of them are very strong. -There is a hum ...

Hmm, I will start with my criticism: On a whole, this story is very choppy, you have a lot of very short sentences. Don't be afraid to throw some more ...

While I understand that this is fresh out of the notebook, I think it may be beneficial for you to do some editing. As for the Poem itself, you did ...

This is a funny and unusual spin on the more usual "Writers block" poem. While I disagree with the structure of the poem in terms of line breaks, I, probably ...

This is an interesting poem, I like the sort of off beat tempo that you develop with this one. Usually I dont like capitalization that is not needed, however, I ...