Gadi.

Ebony looked at the girl beneath him. "Everything's gonna be alright," he said. The girl's falcon was wounded, the red seeping all across the earth. "What is his name?" "S-s-sly..." ...

Ronny, Althea, and Danny all escaped from the house. Each one had their weapons in their hand, ready to kill. "We have to go somewhere where it's dark," Ronny said. ...

I liked this! Ha! Oh, the satire. The first sentence drew me in completely. I loved all the rhymes in this poem, only one felt a bit forced. You sit ...

Wow. That is amazing. YWS grew double in size! (And I was someone who helped...:))

I like it. The only two major problems I have with this are 1) The characters talk the same way. They are both sarcastic, they both have the same dialect, ...

When night comes in Madrid, the city wakes up. The girl leaned across steel tables in the tapas bar, a few miles away from Puerta del Sol. Her teeth were ...

"We need hide... it ." Danny said. Althea cracked the eggs straight into the skillet. "Goddamn it," she said, "there is blood in the yolk." "I like those the best," ...

This is more like a synopsis of a novel than a real story. It is info-dump. I really can't see any way to fix it, but I think as a ...

This is better than some prologues around here. I have to say, I was impressed by the ability of you to show us just a little of the place, the ...

""a tiger behind that cool face."" Ugh. Bad nickname. Plain ol' "Tiger" would be beter. "Like his namesake, the roc bird, he was a loner" SHOW DON'T TEL!!! "Now Patrick ...

Me too! Name- Ebony Gender- male Age- 18 Looks- Blond, long hair, black clothes, big blue eyes, tan skin, average size, hairy arms. Deamon's Name- Ginger Deamon's Form- Golden Retriever ...

HAHA! I liked this! A lot! You describe the jam in a comic way, and still we can see it, sitting there, all alone and sticky and..hahaha! Just change the ...

Mmmm... I liked it. It was not amazing, but the rhythm, the rhyme, the sound, the dynamics--all were pretty nice! Just one suggestion (a general one): Use stronger words. Here ...

Down falls the world Around your ears I like this! A house for you And all your peers I no like this! Ugh. Forced, way too forced... And what is ...

I am in! Name: Paul Stalione Age: 28 Gender: Male Build: Eye color and Hair color: Elite Group Rank: Assassin Speciality: Knives Equipment: A pistol, two kitchen knives, arsenic Personality: ...