User avatar

Irislillygray

Irislillygray

  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: Trials of a Master Thief: Chapter Two

    That was awesome! I loved it! Very well written and interesting too! I was funny and adventurous! There are only a few things I want to point out, but I ...

    Nov 15, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, Fantasy Re: Something More, Something Unique Chapter 6.1

    "Sully was a treat." I am not sure what this meant, is he a treat to look at, if so describe his hotness! “So kiddo,” he began, biting into an ...

    Nov 15, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » General, Action / Adventure Re: Something More, Something Unique Chapter 2

    Hi! Iris here, I am back for another review! I hope that I can help! First some quick corrections. "This house was only twenty years old, only three years older ...

    Oct 21, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, Fantasy Re: Something More, Something Unique Chapter 1

    Hello! It's Iris, What a great opening chapter! I liked it, but I do have a few things to point out. "it feeling as if it was a piggy bank ...

    Oct 20, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: Trials of a Master Thief: Chapter 1

    Wow! What an awesome beginning to what seems like an awesome story! Not much I can correct you on, but here goes nothing! Fist off, I am not sure what ...

    Sep 19, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, Science Fiction Re: The Battle For New Earth Chapter Two

    Very nice, I love how you made the Uranians seem more human. A lot of the enemies in stories are mindless monsters, I like how you gave them a more ...

    Sep 19, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Science Fiction, Action / Adventure Re: The Battle For New Earth Chapter One

    Good start to your story! I liked it! Here are a few tips I have. I hope they help you! This sentence is a little choppy, "He climbed off his ...

    Aug 13, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: Fighters Paradise Prologue

    Interesting, very mysterious. I like the last sentence. I like the ideal and were you are heading with your story, but I want more. I want more description. The vagueness ...

    Aug 13, 2017
  • Novel / Chapter » Science Fiction, Romantic Re: The Tranquil Drownings - [prologue & the eulogy]

    Wow, deep. But here is a few pointers. Don't know if they will help, you can do with them what you wish. "This sea owns me, owes me." You say ...

    Aug 12, 2017


When I use caps I do not want you to read it like a little screech, I want you to read it like a 5,000 year old ogre with the strength of 10,000 men.
— avianwings47