JC

hehe, opps...where is that? I'm used to writing everything in second person, I'm gradually introducing myself to third (with this), and even second...which was a bit of a failure....*tears* Anyways, ...

No, it's okay. You got it right. I guess, the narrator of the story wasn't staying with him because she felt it was her 'feminine duty', it was because she ...

I disagree, I like the last midnight. It fits...unless you already deleated it, in which case, awesome. There isn't much I can say to fix here, while it was emotional ...

Oh god. That's a huge block of text....seriously. Double space between paragraphs, and I'll come back and read it. -JC

Why would you want her to leave him? (this is just a question to the reader for my own learning purposes, please answer as truthfully as you can)

Where does the new stuff for chapter two start?

My assumptions are proven correct when I heard Ms. Irsonja’s heavy Irish accent calling as she stomps up and down the halls upstairs, banging on doors with her meaty fist ...

Merci, Jesise =D I'm glad you enjoyed it. -JC

Yeah, I really want to publish this one when it's finished. My first attempt at publishing a book (illusions) well....lets just just say it didn't quite work out. So I'm ...

Eh, whether it is or isn't, it still gives me something to think about =D I guess this was supposed to be a tad depressing...less of a story than just ...

Being through something helps, a lot. I've actually never been through Jamie's situation (thank goodness), but writing it is surprisingly easy, even to fit in all the emotion. Some of ...

It's supposed to be repeditive. Like, how it was in the beginning, what happened to create change, and then how in the end, nothing had changed at all...

toast out of the toasted Toaster? The moment I opened the door to outside, the sun hit me like razor blades. I cringed, and then put my head up to ...

This was really good. It had just the right amount of emotion without going overboard on the romantic side of things. Kudos to you! One thing you could fix though. ...

Sam, this is really good. I really enjoyed it. (small insignifigant note: I almost said quite instead of really...that's how into the story I got) Question? Is this a short ...