Junel

Hey, this is a wonderful story, from the plot to the writing in general. First I want to get the boring stuff out of the way Grammatical etc. errors: that ...

Hey, First for the boring stuff... Grammatical Etc. errors: that ran in rows up and down the cupboard-room . Cupboard-room should just be cupboard room no hyphen is needed. under ...

Hey, sorry this took me so long to complete, but here it is never the less. First for the boring stuff... Grammatical Etc. errors: Zara ask , in a slightly ...

Hey, I been enjoying your story it's very interesting. First for the boring stuff... Grammatical Etc. errors: First I would like to ask are you American or not? I ask ...

Hey, I'm really enjoying your story! I did go back and read the other chapter so that I could review this and understand everything. Let's start with the boring stuff...Grammatical ...

Hey, a great second chapter Grammatical Etc. errors: Tessa’s best friends greet her when she gets out of the car as I spot Zara walking into school glued to her ...

Hey, Grammatical Etc. errors: Once Julia recovered, So this statement is confusing, I went back and re-read the end of the last chapter, but this still doesn't make much sense. ...

Hey, this is a great start to a story. Grammatical Etc. errors: Terra dodged the flying arrow and quickly threw a knife, successfully hitting his opponent in the shoulder, blood ...

Hey, Grammatical Etc. errors: First I want to say that although they all make sense you do have a lot of run-ons. Some you could just split into multiple sentences ...

Hey, this is well, A good story. Ok, I just had to do that, but yeah this was awesome. Grammatical Etc. errors: She watched, with bated breath, contemplating what she ...

Hey, yes you should continue this! I love it! Grammatical Etc. errors: extra ability disappear whenever she was Add to in between ability and disappear Aveya made it closer to ...

Hey, another great chapter! Grammatical Etc. errors: thinking of her made me cry even more. Thinking should be capitalized. More like "was murdered". More should be lowercase. No, lily would ...

Hey, this is getting very interesting. Grammatical Etc. errors: As far as I saw there are no errors in this chapter! Characters: We have met a new character (Gabriel) and ...

Hey, this is great! Grammatical Etc. errors: A sudden figure flopped down in the middle of the room. It was a generating blob like it’s turning into something .“Oh!” Rei ...

Hey, you have a very interesting story that is super fun to read. Characters: So you have well developed characters by this point and they all have specifics emotions and ...