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Juniper

  • Lyric Poetry Re: she

    Zen, Take this poem slowly. You have so much potential here; this poem is bursting with idea and if not complete originality, it has emotion and tone to it, but ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Peace

    Hey Lyndzie, June here, I think that the problem with this poem is the lack of consistency stops the way of the flow and holds it back. Look here: I ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Bastard I Have Loved

    Awake! I truly enjoyed this. You have a wonderful rhythm, consistent meter, perfect rhyme, and while the poem may not be the most original, I think you've done an absolutely ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Three Words of Pleasure

    Bonjour, Ahmed! June here! :) Let's have a look at this, She lay beside me, completely flat on the bed, With her memorizing body, and her silky brown hair. My ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Yuletide Indiscretions

    Speeeeeele, I enjoyed this poem! The drive of emotion throughout was pretty strong, and that's what I like to see. You drift, though. It's hard to keep track of your ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Grandma [Edit]

    Hey, Lydia! I'm not sure how much I like the rhyme in this; I feel that there are some things about it that could be improved, because some lines feel ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Erithean Seas

    Hallo, Leza! Kyllo did quite a wonderful review there, and I would just say I concur and walk away, buuuut... Good work. I like the ideas you introduce, and in ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Death Clock

    Hey, Flooooower, Okay, let's see! This is decent, but it's just that. I feel like you have bones here with excess fat and not enough muscle; you need to trim ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Love

    Hey, Bailey! Long time, no see. :) This is cute; I like the description of love, but why make it so outward? If you had used first person and said ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Carpe Diem (We will not be forgotten) [Working Title]

    Hallo, Spike! Nicely done! I quite like the basis on idea that you've built in this; it's rather creative, although some parts do stand some room for improvement. Let's see: ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: i want it

    Hey there, Britt! Welcome to YWS! This isn't so bad, but I think you should elaborate a little more, probably give us a bit more on setting and why she ...

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Lounge, The Re: YWS Has Gone Leet!

    1337ftw. We're only about halfway through January. I don't see why we can't make it to 6000 if we crack whips and threaten to relieve people of their foodstuffs.

    Jan 18, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Cracking Calcium (Poem 3 0f 50 for Pengu)

    Jonnie-yoz, Juneth here, The butterfly doesn't transform -- only our perception. Word this better! This sounds really boring, and I even would've preferred this is if you said "The butterfly ...

    Jan 17, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: light will be my stepping stone.

    Heeeey, Eddie! 1100th review, as promised. :) Let's see, I like this, for plenty of reasons, namely because it comes off stronger than your others, carries on strongly and has ...

    Jan 17, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Celestia

    Hi, Dradian! June here :) I quite like this! Some parts of it were really pretty, such as the second stanza. I love creative images like that; they make me ...

    Jan 17, 2010


More than anything she wanted the world to be uncomplicated, for right and wrong to be as easily divided as the black and white sections of an Oreo. But the world was not a cookie.
— Roshani Chokshi, Aru Shah and the Tree of Wishes