Lorrilrakest.

Okay, im starting to understand that people are confused :] I need to capture the essence of confusion, but not to stir people away because they don't understand it. Hmm. ...

Well ... er ... thanks for the help then, fading-dream :/ A great review. I clearly stated that the whole story would not be like that, and so I hope ...

I'm glad people kind of like it now. I definitely appreciate your help rlw, I can understand how much better that makes it. And as for your question LoveLess, you ...

Right, also, do you think just writing plain descriptive text and stuff will catch the attention as well? I want to do something different, that's all, really. And also, can ...

This story was based on true events. So cliche and bad - twist it a little!

7.10 interesting :)

Thanks for the feedback :] And i'm glad you like it, Jessie :] Do you think it can still "grab your attention" without references to child molestation and stuff - ...

Well at first, the show Heroes - because it hit me that it would be incredibly scary from a human's point of view. And then Twilight (despite the lovey stuff) ...

That's cool :] I've tried loads of different beginnings and none of them really set the scene for what I wanted. I want something dark, yet sets the style of ...

Reply: She opened the door and felt the hot rays of the sun on her skin. They caressed her as she was held still by the hypnotic beams. She smiled ...

8.2/10 XD Teletubbie reminiscing XD

These are the first few sentences of my novel - possibly a prologue. It's going to be pretty taboo. “I'm seeing things that aren't there.” “I'm having murderous feelings.” “I ...

hmm. write more. im not exactly intrigued - its a bit cliche. im sure if i had read more, there would have been something better quality there.

I just watched Derren Brown :0 Im going to research the CIA and stuff!

7 - It's a bit odd, and you obviously need the rest of the context, but short and attention demanding. "It was an iconic image - the clean white towel ...