Merry_Haven

ShushBeDeath- I read your short story and I'm off to review... :wink: You had a lot of referring to the past. Which helped me understand about Anna and the grandma. ...

Writingdreams159- When I first read this I noticed that it was long. Very long. But then I also noticed that you placed 3-4 chapters in one thread. Try to put ...

clueless- This doesn't seem like a chapter 1, more like a prologue or preface. If this is part of a story then give more detail on Jeremy, Derek and Caitlyn. ...

ShushBeDeath- Shall I call you that or something else? :wink: Anyway, welcome to YWS! So you write about fantasy, sci-fi, and everyday life. How cool! I should like to read ...

Ashley- This was a long chapter but it gave me more insight on the character's thoughts and feelings. When I read about Rebecca in this chapter, I thought of Victoria ...

Ashley- Okay, this story is totally grabbing me in. Not like it hasn't before, it's just that it's gotten intense now. The coven situation is sad, and I liked Phillip ...

Ashley- I can't say I like the relationship between Issac and Sophia or not. I felt like this chapter went a little too fast for the relationship. So when I ...

Ashley- Dude, Issac must have a thing for Sophia if he gripped her too tightly. But I think I already knew that. :wink: When I read this I was like: ...

Ashley- I can't believe that Sophia got 'solitary confinement' in her room for the weekend. Yet there was a purpose behind that. But seriously why?! Is Sophia ever going to ...

Ashley- Wow. The detail for this chapter and any other chapter for this story is so unexplainable. I can't really find a word for it, besides amazing. The detail on ...

Imaginative- First off, I'm gonna call you that. 'Cause I'm sure you're imaginative when it comes to your work. :D Oh, so you're a Twilight fan? And a Harry Potter ...

Titch123 - One thing I noticed when reading the revised part was that it was longer. that was great, and it gave me more information about the story. After the ...

To everyone: I am no longer writing or editing this piece. Please check out my other works. Thank you.

Ashley- I actually wrote this yesterday, so it might be choppy. And yes, I noticed that I was telling things not showing them. So I'm gonna fix the chapters right ...

Ashley- Sorry that you had to do the correcting thing again. I thought it'll be easier for me to break it up in two parts. Anyway, thanks. Sometime today, I'll ...