Nate

Wow, you already edited this. “It depends…” I really like how you changed this. Excellent. The title is also much better than before. Always awesome to see something that just ...

Did 5 today! So that leaves only 89 to go... I need to step it up. I have nothing going on after tomorrow except for Christmas, so I think I ...

I reviewed another work by yourself, and I like this one a lot more. You said that you proofread this one, and it shows. I also like the general idea ...

You don't disappoint Jack. I found this to be well-written, and your imagery & tone is excellent. The poem comes across as melancholy and wistful. The speaker is captured well, ...

Proofread! Just by proofreading, you'll put your work above 90% of the other stuff that gets posted. You want to read your story at least twice before posting it; that ...

Proofread. a book who's page For a poem as short as this, you really shouldn't have spelling errors or simple grammatical mistakes such as this. In fact, I'm not sure ...

Yep, OE is exactly right, and I don't want her point to be missed so I'm bolding the last line of my first post: YWS is a community for young ...

If a Greeter, Instructor, JM, Moderator, or an admin contacts you, the least you can do in return is be polite. These people put in a lot of time and ...

I thought it was pretty good. Just a few things: The last line in the first stanza doesn't go right. For one, it's too abrupt; you're shifting from being figurative ...

Did six today; only 94 left!

anti-pop hit the nail on the head; I'd take everything she said to heart. First, I'm moving this to "Other Fiction." It doesn't belong in "Non-Fiction" only because it's made-up; ...

This is awesome Flemzo. Truly awesome. Thank you for providing me with something good to read :P My only critique is the last line of the third stanza; it doesn't ...

It's evident to me you didn't spend much time on this. Why? Because you misspelled "once." When you have a poem as short as this, there's no real excuse for ...

In the future, please remember to rate your stories. This needed a rating of R for the sexual situation, and if a story is going to be rated R, then ...

Aye, if you're going to just put up a quick scene, you do need to add a quick note about that. Without knowing what the rest of the story involves, ...