Ofour

Meh... It's a person with blue hair. 6/10

Surprisingly not, I think you need to read deeper into this poem: I do not say that I am God, merely that I found God within me. There is no ...

The poem itself is very choppy, you have a lot of short sentences which I don't think work very well. Gurby

"stilled sands of time she preyed" - Do you mean "prayed", and I think this should end with a full-stop. "Like swords it slashed the skin," - I'd put a ...

1. "Dream deep... sweet dreams" - nice 10/10 2. lol roflmao 10/10

I cannot remember the plot exactly because I read it a while ago but I do remember enjoying it a great deal.

Apple Juices rools.

"a gray wolf" - capital A. ""What is it Rogue?" Jake asked" - full-stop after "asked". "from it's place" - no apostrophe needed. "shot off a warning shoot" - "shot", ...

Go to the relevant section in Literary (see top of screen) e.g Dramatic Poetry. Then click "New Topic" and hey pesto (yes, pesto), you have a story. I am sorry ...

"I feel embarrassed, ugly, scared" - following from the first two I felt that it should be "scarred" but I wonder as to whether that is what you meant. I ...

Nice, but shallow. It deoesn't leave the reader with any un-answered questions or oideas on which to ponder. We are left feeling your contentedness and tranquillity, but nothing else. Your ...

"Life is why we are all here" - I don't really agree. Life is not a reason. "Yet no-one seems to care" - again, I disagree. " others than yourself" ...

"where neighbours where treated more like aquatences" - "were" and "acquaintances". "as apposed to" -"opposed". "It was rather strange then that hidden away behind the high walled gardens, company car

ditto means "repeat last comment" in this situation.

Don't put yourself down so much... but I agree. Didn't contain much depth, just a basic description of what is happening around you, it doesn't induce any challenging or profound ...