PrehistoricEchoes

Thanks for the review! I caught a lot of plot holes writing this, but I figured I'd just post it anyway and see what others had to say first. The ...

Hmm, I'm considering rewriting Terya's introduction, since there's a lot of backstory that causes her to behave the way she does, but I may not be portraying it properly. Anyway, ...

Thanks for the review! And for the watch as well! One thing I found funny is that you jokingly asked "Can women not learn this manipulation?" since it is in ...

Thanks for reviewing the full chapter! I think I can answer your questions, but I can see why you asked them. I'll do some editing to make the answers apparent ...

Thanks for the review! Glad you liked it. I will rework the continuity of it like you said. I worked on the chapter over the course of a month, so ...

Eh, I wouldn't call it random. Just needs a bit of work. Again, it could work as more of a prologue than a first chapter, but it still works as ...

A fellow Bionicle fan? Astounding! Anyway, there are a few things. And yes, there can't be female Toa of Stone, but there's a lot of them in the fandom and ...

Thanks for the review! Glad to see you liked Josh's character. He'll be a bit more "flawed" as the story goes on and more traits develop. There's more to him ...

Thanks for the review. I'm glad the character came across for you. I got kind of worried writing his character at first, since realism can be hard to convey. As ...

Sorry, a mech is the FRAME. It's the overall term for "giant robot in fiction". I should probably clarify that. I'll try to polish up some of the descriptions. They ...

Thanks! I did change some wording, as the sniper did let his enemies live. I'll start reworking it a bit. Some of the adjectives are useless, and others need to ...

Reminds me a bit of an old CS Lewis quote: "I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because ...

Yeah, I do have a problem with repetition I've noticed. Happens in a lot of work, especially when I work on chapters over the course of time. As for a ...

Like I said, the setting's not a bad thing. Archetypical settings are always going to turn up, and you've got a lot of original ideas for it. Enough to where ...

Wow, thanks! I honestly wasn't expecting that positive a reaction. Glad you liked the beginnings of the setting. Most of the problems you pointed out were probably the result of ...