Sapphire

Hi! I think this poem has higher potential than it's currently reaching. At the moment, I think it's a bit too much like prose and the poetic techniques are too ...

Firstly, I love the title! I think it is a very sweet and fitting metaphor. I do have a few suggestions: I put my trust out there every time, trusting ...

Hey! I reviewed the earlier version of this but now I've read this again, I have a few more suggestions (in bold). Punctuation/typo changes are also in bold, but I ...

I loved it! Where on earth did you get the idea? :lol: My only suggestion: I don't know if it was intentional or not, but from the second line onward ...

I liked this! I only have a couple of suggestions that I think would improve the flow slightly, but they're really minor points. Shallow Muse - Love the title. My ...

Hi Scarlett! Welcome to YWS. Love is possibly the most written about topic so I think I agree with you that every poet has written something about it (even if ...

Hi! Welcome to YWS! I really liked this. I've quoted it so I can make suggestions as to punctuation you could use, in an attempt to make myself feel useful. ...

Hi! As always, there were examples of great imagery and language. However, I felt that there were a couple of awkward sections as well: A year with you, a sigh ...

I love this poem. It's so full of brilliant imagery and ideas that it's difficult to pick a favourite section, but I love: I carved my initials into its soul ...

I agree with andimlovegalore on the best stanza, but I have the same uncertainty over what it is you're trying to say. It is a little bit like the first ...

I thought this was really sweet! However, I think there are a few things you could change to improve it further. Your introduction is brilliant! Being extra picky, I think ...

I only read this today, even though it's from last week, and I just wanted to leave a comment and say how much I liked it! The only thing that ...

Hi! I thought some lines in the poem were pretty, but at times it became incredibly confusing. Here's what I mean: Rise of Dreams Smoothly [s]do[/s] they glide, Smoothly [s]do[/s] ...

Hey! There were some great lines in this poem but a couple that raised questions or could be improved. The parasite in my brain Creeps closer and closer. These lines ...

Hey! This reminded me of Phantom of the Opera. (That's good!) I like it more the more I read it. When a poem is so short and simple, each word ...