Skye

Okay, so Cassandra already addressed the info-dumping issue, and I back her 100%. Letting the characters' details leak out one by one is far more satisfying for the writer than ...

night air sticks to the insides of my ribs dizzying breathlessness on the verge of tears, terror – ..................... can you feel it pulsing now? passion never really was our ...

The end.

Great post, Jack. Definitely something to strive for. :)

Can she reply? EDIT: Yes she can!

I officially love you forever. *saves*

Pale blues or whites. Anything lacey, really. I've always wanted to wear black, but Mother insists it's awful for my complexion. I wonder what I'll do if I have to ...

I read the first couple paragraphs (prologue, right?) and practically fell out of my chair. Yeah, it was that fabulous. So, I'm finally getting started on your crit -- yes, ...

I loved it too! Especially at the beginning, when you described Avarn. He was definitely enigmatic and cool. :) I also liked Tannar, whom you characterized well (ie, staring, fiddling ...

Pretty shweet! I agree with Sponson though, the loop is kinda crazy on the Koda Kumi ones. I love the hand one. :)

Cute indeed! Believable characters/dialogue as well. I just read your post about play writing, so I'm wondering if this is what you ended up with for your class?

Mmh... You have a sexy voice. ;) This was a fabulous poem, both out loud and on paper, which seems to be a rare accomplishment indeed. No criticism, just love.

I agree with Jiggity, having the angel on the "bad" side is a cool little touch. In fact, I liked the whole thing, just... For example, there was the time ...

I voted description, just because I don't think I'm half bad at putting pretty words together. I like characterization too, though.

I, too, am rather shy about my writing. Two of my closest friends know, and they write as well. My parents know I write prose, but not poetry. I never ...