Snoink

:P It didn't suck. In fact, it was quite good. The one thing that I would suggest (besides clearing the typos, but you guessed that) is to make it clear ...

Well, think about it. Domino castles that fall over and the snowglobe. It just shouts out, "OMG! CITIZEN KANE!" But in a good way.

Yay! I didn't skim it this time! It's not one of those things that you can skim, understand. I think it's weird, but in a cool way. I also think ...

Rosebud...

Hehe... ouch. Poor character! And that's a bad angel. Bad angel! Still, I did like it. Scary message though... He was beautiful--more beautiful than anything I’ve ever seen before. I ...

Ah... dreams are so mysterious, no? My mind races behind sealed eyes, Unaware of the internal betrayal. Gears are turning, but nothing is apparent. This pretty much says it all. ...

I didn't think there was any distinction. - The freak What would you do if you became blind?

After spending about... five billion minutes touching up her snout, someone barged in. It was the AI. The AI, Snoink noticed, had been programmed to wear only a mini skirt ...

Hmmm... I don't think this is flowing right. Poetry, even weird, fragmented poetry, usually has a lilt. So yes, you might have weird line breaks and everything, but the test ...

It's interesting seeing you, who makes a big deal out of the tiniest errors, writing a poem like this. It was pretty amusing. Hehehe... poetry is a little bit more ...

Oh yeah. I can definitely see this in song format. It's not too heavy, but not too light either, and, though a little awkward in the poetical sense, with some ...

The frolicking pony is very pretentious so he always skipped around trees. When suddenly groundhogs attacked nearby settlers who were smoking some turkeys. Howling winds blasted rifles, the men graspe

Thanks for all the tips and comments! I've edited the poem according to your suggestions, so now it's a lot sparkly and stuff. :) Grif: *eats tiger cub* ;) Sharty: ...

The freak: I don't know how to write. That's illegal. Sadie's father: At a distance. You can't see their reactions then. Daniel: But what if you hurt them? Sadie's father: ...

I'm sure you can get better. It just takes a lot of practice though. ;)