Snoink

Venturepants! You have a fun name! :D Anyway, I think I may have ADD or something... when I was reading your poem, I kept stopping and going. The effect that ...

Hey Yuri! So, she's blind, eh? ;) This means that you've only did a fourth of the poem! She still has taste, touch, and smell! And trust me... you remember ...

Hey Thane! :D So, this looks like more of a rap then poetry, if that makes sense, just because of the constant rhyming and jaggedness of it all. So that's ...

Hey Tariq! Since you brought this up again, I'm assuming you want critiques! Anyway, I thought this was really bland. It felt like you wanted to give a message, but ...

Hey! The first skirt was fun! I really liked that. I'm thinking you would probably use some sort of stiff, twisty fabric for that sort of stuff. And yes... I ...

Hey Rhiannon! :D I too thought this was a very cavalier way of dealing with this sort of thing! Maybe too cavalier. I kept on thinking, "Well, if she doesn't ...

One more reasons why people who are 20+ should not be trusted.

THE VISIT: [Mr.Name], one of the senior-level employees at [comp.name] met us at the reception. We were instructed to follow their orders carefully and not to touch their heavy machinery ...

Er... I'm not done yet! I have to go to class! But here is what I have so far. You tend to be far wordier than you need to be ...

Nate... is there any way you can send mass messages about all this? I don't come on here as often as I used to... The problem is, for every one ...

Hey VitaminCakes! You asked me for a comment like... three or four times now, so I figured I would. :P Anyway, while I'm not a photographer or anything, these were ...

YOU'RE CRAZY. No... seriously... you should probably let a friend read your novel or something. That way, you'll get used to it when you finally publish it and become a ...

Hey Mo! :D One thing that you might consider when you edit is to make this more concrete! Right now, the description is very thought-based... you're not actually describing real ...

Hey Mr. Spaceman! :D So, Eli was right! Your sentence structure needs to be spruced up. Try combining sentences or starting with other words besides pronouns... it might make things ...

Loved, loved the title! :D One thing that I want you to try... you have a lot of lines and some of the lines and descriptions can be a bit ...