Snoink

Eek, unnecessary dialogue, lol! I'm also a big culprit of that... it's rather sad! What's worse is that, when you're a culprit of unnecessary dialogue, this unfortunately means you have ...

Hi colorful! Welcome to YWS! :D So, basically, you know how to write vivid images, which is a great! Now, what you want to try to make the vivid images ...

Haha, yes! I second the very good for the first poem bit. :) One thing I love to see in poetry is lots of metaphors and stuff... it's kind of ...

Hi Vampy! :) The main thing that I wondered about in this poem was about the narrator. At first, I figured that the narrator could be God, but since it ...

You should do something entirely different. ;) So he should already know how to fight, but in one of his fights, he should break an arm or something, making him ...

Also! See, my servant will act wisely; he will be raised and lifted up and highly exalted. Just as there were many who were appalled at him— his appearance was ...

I have to say! My favorite part about it was the attic boarding and stuff. Not quite sure what you did, but I love the grainy feel of the wood. ...

Awww, so sweet! A couple of things... You say the boyfriend and the girlfriend way too much, I think. I would rather use their real names. :P Still... one thing ...

Oh gosh... I can totally relate. I hate posting my new work up here, lol. Especially stories! Poems are one thing... stories are like soul-dumps for me and just the ...

First, gimmicky writing doesn't mean it's good writing. In fact, most of the time, it's bad writing. In this case, it's bad writing. Get rid of the bad grammar in ...

Hey Nutty! Two things! First of all, I want to see more action when she spills hot coffee all over herself. Why? Because that sort of stuff totally wakes you ...

Haha, this was pretty cute! I would have it more centered on the girl... after all, this is her dream, so why would she dream about someone watching her? I ...

Omg! Horses! They're like... the cutest things ever. I think I had an argument on YWS once... which one is better, horses or boys? And horses absolutely won (though the ...

Turning water to win? How is this not amazing??? And silly Bolt, you need to read the bible more, especially the books in the New Testament if you're going to ...

Okay! This mostly amuses me, but when I look at my profile statistics, it doesn't tell me my most active forum. I am pretty sure that's because my mere profile ...