Snoink

Hey Kate! Nice to finally see your story! :D Okay! So the beginning of this story reminds me of my story. There are a couple of reasons why: 1) The ...

Hello and welcome to YWS! :D First of all, your use of "pelts" kind of threw me off a little, simply because pelts are from skinned animals. So... um... are ...

I like the idea, but the execution was rather poor, so let's talk about that. First of all, metaphors and similes. I know you love them. I love them too. ...

I claim this spot! ~ Whoa... 2009. What a year! First of all, thank you Nate for putting up with the evil, horrible things I put you through each and ...

Hello! Okay, so this may be geeky, but I totally read it for the title. Yep. Geeky. However, when you start with electrons, and when I was reading the first ...

EEK! You've written one of those "based off a fairy tale" things. I love those sorts of stories! Just one thing I found that I didn't like: "I shook her ...

LOL. Green elephants! This reminds me of a quote by Dostoyevsky: “Try to pose for yourself this task: not to think of a polar bear, and you will see that ...

Sesame chicken! Lemon chicken! Sweet and sour pork! Broccoli beef! Chow mein! Chow fun! Fried Rice! Crab-filled wontons! Fried potstickers! And OMG. We have a gazillion Chinese food restaurants over ...

I saw this when I was older! I was scared because I thought they were going to ruin the book (I adored the book) but when I saw the screenplay ...

First of all! "It is therefore imperative for us g to adopt..." Random g! Now, the content... This is too vague to make any sort of valid argument. It consists ...

Kiss me this once and let's not confuse ourselves with terminology. You know what I want -- I want to squeeze your lips with my own, letting your strawberry lips ...

Don't bother with the prologue... just dive right into the story. It'll be better, honest. :D

I think you might be better with some consolidation here! You have a lot of different images thrown in, so you either have to combine them better so that they ...

Eek! If they give you a question, you have to answer it! The easiest way to lose is to not answer the question and then simply spit it out back ...

A rather dismal thought, but whatever! It's not really a story at all, so I won't bother you about the lack of conflict or whatever. However, there are several points ...