Snoink

Hello and welcome to YWS! I'm going to move to "Other Fiction" because it really belongs there, and it'll probably get more traffic there anyway. Okay? ^_^ Ahhhh... lovely grammar. ...

Hahahaa... the first one looks like there is a girl who is trapped underneath a desk! Like, a ghost or something. The shoe? In a world of books? Exciting! Anyway, ...

Hahaha, this was cute. Not that I really watch Dr. Who (only saw one episode) but I like the dedication you put in this poem. :D I like the rhyming ...

This seems like a run on sentence split into line breaks to become poetic. Remeber: punctuation is a good thing, and it is essential in poetry so you can shape ...

Wombs are NOT in guys. Wombs are in girls. So use a body part that is different. This story is really really confusing. I mean, the parts don't seem to ...

Ay, I understand this perfectly. But at the same time, you can do so much more with this! Right now, you're just saying the same things over and over. You ...

The boy who’s intelligence is well-used, It's not "who's" (which is a contraction for "who is") but "whose" which means it's possessive. ^_^ I love the title of the poem, ...

If it's a riddle, don't tell us what it is. In fact, don't even say, "What am I?" We should be able to determine that this is a riddle with ...

At the moment, this is kind of repetitious. You keep telling us that the narrator is tired, but you really don't tell us why or give us any reason why ...

(I told you it was good.) :P

WHENCE! You are supposed to post all the parts TOGETHER. I mean, I like to have points and everything, but still! You post them together so that we can make ...

Hahaha, just keep it an arcrostic and, for those in the know, they can giggle, and for those who don't know French *waves hand frantically* they can flail around until ...

If you didn't want us to critique it, you should have put it somewhere else. ;):P Anyway, I think a good title for it (a better one than "Doesn't have ...

Haha... strangely enough, this thread has been revived when I have to revise a character death scene and make it more realistic. O_o My two cents? Hysterical characters are hard ...

“I did not do it,” he whispered. This is the first time he doesn't say, "I didn't do it!" Make it important. Italicize "not" to have a greater effect. Anyway, ...