Snoink

Hey, LovePeace! :D First of all, welcome to YWS! Okay, now that's done... I think this is pretty interesting story, but I am kind of a sucker for ghost stories, ...

Hey mizzy! I know what you're trying to do... really, I do! But I don't like it. It's not as concise and pretty as Hemingway's story. Plus, with Hemingway's story, ...

Hey Auteur! It looks like you have a crazy dream here, and because of that, I kind of adore this piece. It's really unique and surreal and awesome, in general. ...

Hey defendthelegend! So, obviously you really don't like social networking sites! This is fine. But reading your poem, we really don't get a clear idea as to why you don't ...

Hey Nativecatcher! I would like more of a play-by-play of the game and less adjectives used when describing the chessmen. It's pretty clear at the start that you are talking ...

Hi Angel! The sun orbits/around your moonless soul What are you talking about here? It's not very clear. I know it can't be Jupiter or the Sun or Saturn or ...

Hey Kevo! One of the things that kind of annoyed me was the constant crying! And mind you, I've been to these sorts of where everybody is pretty much crying. ...

Hey UnknownPoet! As far as hate poetry goes, this is pretty lame! In fact, it seems rather comedic all in all, in a very crass way of course. If you ...

Hey Auteur! :D You have a fantastic last line! The problem is that it's the strongest line of the poem and your title. So I was expecting more. :P I ...

Hey Peanut! The main thing that bugs me (which probably doesn't bug anybody else) is how painless this seems. As somebody who has had a head injury before, I can ...

Hey Shexay! The main thing I'm wondering about as far as this poem goes is why is this person falling off a cliff (or an otherwise tall thing... it could ...

Hey Arris! This is a much better poem than the first one I looked at, so yay for you! Now, make sure not to do that ugly thing where you ...

Hey Arris! My favorite parts of the poem are these: Silence, Silence, it calls for noise; like the glittering water, splashed by koi. The whispering and the wavering, the croaking ...

Hey brainychic! Neat experimentation! :D Just a couple of things! You develop one of your characters, the callow boy, and talk about how he loves and tends this one tulip, ...

Hey Forest! :D You keep on using similes and such to say what the person is like, but your similes never really tell what the person is like at all. ...