Snoink

Awww... romance! :D Try to avoid the pitfall of describing every single little thing about your characters... it's better to describe them in increments rather than describe them in a ...

Strong statements should be that -- strong. But this is so ambiguous and vague that it's hardly such. Without your explanation, it would have meant absolutely nothing to anyone... and ...

Hey Howler! I rated your piece 16+ because it has the word "fuck" in it. :) Interesting premise! I like well-crafted reflection scenes that really make it so that we ...

Layla! You got me at my knees... Okay, no more Eric Clapton references. :D This poem has a weak start! Because this a poem that is essentially about rape, it ...

What I live - Is more real then you'd ever dream

Hehe, cute poem! :D But one question... marshmallow peeps? Isn't that a candy for Easter instead of St. Valentine's Day? Or did the Peeps company expand to give out heart-shaped ...

Hey Matt! :D It seems like in your poem you use lots of repetition and such of the same image over and over again. But this can get rather boring. ...

Hey lonewolf! Welcome to YWS! :D Your script is a little short and rather disconnected, which may explain why your filming was interrupted constantly! Try lengthening it up and giving ...

Hi Mrs. Chaos! Welcome to YWS! :D So You started on a pretty interesting note! They were obviously very uncomfortable with each other, and that sort of conflict is pretty ...

Hahaha! What an interesting story! Definitely didn't suspect that ending! Now, one thing... the ending is a little confusing because it doesn't really make it clear who he's fantasizing over... ...

Hey emmylou! :D So! You started off with a lot of action, which was really really cool! I mean, come on... somebody getting branded? How much more awesome could you ...

Hey snickerdooly! Your name is sooooo cute. I mean it! :D Okay, now on with the review! What I kept on wondering when I read this piece was, "Why would ...

Emily! I never knew you wrote poetry. :D Okay! So your poem... at first I thought you were talking about what would happen in real life and stuff, but then ...

I checked this, mostly to see if the rating (18) was correct, but I have to say... your rape scene is awful. No description, no passion. It falls flat on ...

There are typos! Correct them when you get up. :) The main comment is know you're reader. If you want to make us read it, make it interesting to us! ...