Snoink

Hey lonewolf! I figured I would take a look at your story. :) Anyway, your story is really hard to read because of the grammar. You use periods sparingly, your ...

Hi Poly! :) All right! Out of everything here, I think you could really make the ending much stronger. I mean, let's look at the opening line here: I moaned ...

Hi! I love this story, so I'm glad to see it here! :) My first comment is that you switch from talking about Jesus in the third person to speaking ...

I think I love you. Also, if these are just fragments, I think I would be interested in reading the larger project. After all, the way you present these ideas ...

Hi Wolfdra! I was avoiding these sorts of posts around September 11, so I didn't get a chance to see this. Anyway, I just wanted to say that yeah, crazy ...

Hi AncientForever! Okay, this is going to be a quick comment... This poem sounds a little strange. For one, it doesn't seem clear of who you're talking about or in ...

KITTEH. I didn't see this until now. Don't kill me! >.> .> Of course, um... I could be completely misreading it. I admit this. I have a morbid imagination. But ...

Hey Dreamwalker! :D Okay so... yeah, this is definitely a weird love poem. Not quite sure if I would call it quite a "love" poem as there doesn't seem to ...

Hey Veritas! I was kind of avoiding September 11 pieces before while the sensationalism was at its highest, so I didn't get a chance to read this until now (what ...

Hi inkwell! :) Okay, so you're a gifted writer that can use the the five senses in order to express yourself. For example, in this poem you have the taste ...

Hi Cspr! I saw some of your later chapters lying around unreviewed, so I figured I would review them... but first, it's always good reading the first stuff, right? ;) ...

Hey duckiedye! :D Oh wow, you have quite a story! I can imagine why you wouldn't want to testify... frankly, that sounds rather awful. I mean, you finally get over ...

Oh wow, this is interesting. Just one quick comment... I don't think you really developed your idea of sterilization. It felt like, instead of arguing your point logically, as you ...

First of all! I used my evil mod powers to fix your paragraphing. WOOHOO, right? Next of all... OMG. TUA. So, Elmo is the mother of Tua? ZOMG. This is ...

Hi Jas! Just a quick comment over here... from what I understand, this is a Roman Catholic funeral, correct? That is, you have the rosary, the statue of Mary, the ...