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Ack, I kind of love this! I love Nate and Grace's relationship with him. Like, I really, really adore them together. I kind of wonder how they didn't work out ...

Hmmm... not sure if I like this shift. It doesn't sound quite right. I mean, you already mention that Lina has eating disorders, which implies that she looks sick, so ...

Just a few general comments! I kind of adore Lya. She is very perceptive about what her big sister is doing (d'awww) and very cute. Lina is kind of sad. ...

Hi! I edited your post so that it was in "story" mode instead of "normal" mode. That way, now you have paragraphs! So, hopefully you'll get more reviews other than, ...

Ooers. This kind of reminds me of the movie, Pleasantville, which is an awesome movie and I very much recommend it. It also has hints to The Giver. My main ...

Hey Matthew! :D I was reading through this chapter... wow! There is a lot of information here! I mean, consider the following paragraph: The College of Engineering had four branches; ...

Haha! Cute ending!

Hi Solv! So I have to say... I am wondering what sort of relationship they had. It sounds like the girl really didn't care, but the guy possibly had feelings ...

Dun dun dunnnnnn! The plot thickens! Why is he a captain at age 17? That seems a little bit weird. And, if he's in charge, why is he hiding the ...

Woo! It's always interesting reading these sorts of diary things. :) This may just be me, but I kind of like having things not quite explained to me at first. ...

Okay, you are going to hate me, but I wanted to point out a short story on YWS that reminds me of yours: Keeping the Green by smaur Now! The ...

Woo! Science! Nitrogen is actually a rather stable chemical as N2, so I didn't get that at first. It's only reactive under certain combinations. I think you mean to have ...

Hey Fishster! I had to read this from the beginning. :) The coffee shop, Esnatzen, was empty when Seres walked in; the moss green carpet, filled with static, shocked his ...

I saw that this had to do with Kari-Rose and... well... I am Karina Rose, so I figured I would stop by and give this a good review! Anyway, I ...

Hello! First of all, you have a highly catchy first line here! It's very catchy in fact, so I was pretty excited about reading your story. And that's a really ...