chocoholic

Aww... now I feel special. Hehe. Sorry, no suggestions apart from spacing out your writing.

Thanks for all the crits. I left this one for a while, but I decided to edit it a bit today.

Yay! More! Well... let's see... I still think there could be more. I'm a little confused as to what's going on, but I think I'm getting it. You need to ...

Pointless? I think not! To be honest, I prefer the non-drinking bits. I mean, they're cool and all, but I find these ones a lot easier to read and a ...

That was... amazing! Absolutely amazing! Screw JK Rowling, you're the most amazing writer the world has seen!

I liked it. There was real feeling in it, and your language was good. Sorry, but I can't find any problems with it so this crit won't be very helpful. ...

Please go on with it! It was really funny. I couldn't find any mistakes, but it was really cool. You had better continue. (Sorry for the extremely unhelpful review).

I can sometimes read non double-spaced writing on here, but not today. Please fix this up, it's very painful on the eyes.

Haha! Funny poems! Love 'em, but I don't see enough. If the bowl does chance to tip, If the soup from it does slip, Make a puddle on the floor, ...

Nice. I really liked it. I just think that there could be a bit more emotion, I didn't really feel sorry for the girl. But if it's supposed to be ...

I liked it. The imagery was nice, and there was an innocence. As if the speaker was young, and didn't quite know what was going on. I definetely liked it.

Nice, I liked it. But there was one line I didn't get- rumble in the ribcage This line doesn't seem to go with the rest of it. Apart from that ...

Nice. He's a good liar, isn't he? I think Sarah's reaction was really... normal. A newer writer would hvae her rush over and try to set him on the right ...

Unfortunately I was just singing Jingle Bells and I haven't listened to this song for ages so the tune in my head was so wrong, but it was really funny ...

Haha! That is so funny, and it fits really well excpet for the last bit. I sang it out loud and the last two lines didn't seem to quite fit. ...