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nixonblitzen

  • Poetry » Other, General Re: All is Not What It Seems

    My main problem with this is punctuation! I think for some poems it's okay to go light on the punctuation, but in the case of this poem, the lack of ...

    May 9, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: not sure...

    I read this a few days ago and have been meaning to get back. I'd first like to say, what's with the preface? you sound like you have a major ...

    Mar 24, 2009
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: I'm Sorry, Sally Lolly

    I have to say, I think this is really genius. It's so real. I had a friend like this. First she had depression and they were going to move to ...

    Mar 24, 2009
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: The Oval Portrait

    Good job. You are a great storyteller. However, this doesn't seem much like a poem to me. It seems more like prose that you broke up into 4-line stanzas. For ...

    Mar 21, 2009
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: A World Apart

    I love this, especially the last stanza. The way it doesn't rhyme really works with the words themselves to create a feeling of melancholy. It is a bit startling that ...

    Mar 21, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: First Time

    I like this poem. Why do I stop being me, If it’s me in love why do you see someone else? Punctuation: First line should end in a question mark, ...

    Mar 19, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Meant to be heard (reworked)

    Anna, I have to say I love this. The personification of Silence is surprising and pleasant to the reader & I like the language you use. I became somewhat wary ...

    Mar 17, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: The Uknown Embodies the Invisible

    well hello there. i like this quite a bit. it's really disturbing to me, but in a nice catharsis-type literary way. Some nitpicks: As I stand and watch your tears ...

    Mar 15, 2009
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Sitting in Nature

    Wow. Really beautiful and kind of bizarre in a lovely way. I want to be in this setting. Let’s make a nest in the sun amongst the tall grasses towering ...

    Mar 3, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Brute Chieftain

    well now, these crits above me are rather nasty, now aren't they? Okay, I just did some research on halo. master chief is the main character, and the brute chieftain ...

    Mar 3, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Conceptual Feeling

    This is really interesting. You have great ideas! Once I had to write a descriptive paper about cowardice. It's really hard to think up good metaphors, but I like it. ...

    Mar 1, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Lovers and a Pretty Song

    I really like this. I like the relationship of the two stanzas. It's an experience for the reader. It demands a second reading, and that is a very good quality. ...

    Mar 1, 2009
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Who am I

    I love this so much that I'm almost beside myself. The images are beautiful. I think it has some problems, but every suggestion I come up with would take away ...

    Feb 25, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: This Pen is Retired

    I like this. It makes me think of an old grey man who has had a prolific writing career and is now a washed up, sickly hermit. However, I would ...

    Feb 25, 2009
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: Holy Rolling (2)

    I feel humbled giving you any criticism. I love the mood of this piece. The descriptions are just amazing. Personally, I love fragments and I like your use of them. ...

    Feb 23, 2009


You'd better wise up, Pony... you get tough like me and you don't get hurt. You look out for yourself and nothing can touch you, man.
— Dallas Winston, The Outsiders