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phoenixwriter

  • Fantasy Novels Re: Nightshade Chapter 7

    “It seems perfect-” “Yes- the perfect weapon- the perfect poison-” “Quite…” The images in her scrying vision continued to blur and swirl like paint whirled in a pinwheel too quickly. ...

    Jan 2, 2012
  • Fantasy Novels Re: Nightshade Chapter 6.5

    Thank you so much for your praise! I haven't heard much for a long time... and it really means a lot to me that you enjoy it. Please let me ...

    Jan 2, 2012
  • Fantasy Novels Re: Nightshade Chapter 6.5

    Hey everyone! This really seems rough to me, but I can't really put my finger on it. If you could give me some pointers, that would be great! Thanks so ...

    Jan 1, 2012
  • Fantasy Novels Re: Nightshade Chapter 6.5

    Hey everyone! This really seems rough to me, but I can't really put my finger on it. If you could give me some pointers, that would be great! Thanks so ...

    Dec 28, 2011
  • Narrative Poetry Re: Alice is Waiting

    Like the other review, I also thought Alice was dead...until the last stanza. I feel that some stanzas you try to fit in one too many syllables to read at ...

    Nov 21, 2011
  • Science-Fiction Novels Re: First Light - Chapter Two

    Oh my goodness. This chapter would be an ultimate masterpiece if you changed a few things. Most of the story's fine, except a few small tweaks might be needed. Question: ...

    Oct 1, 2011
  • Science-Fiction Novels Re: First Light - Chapter One

    Sorry that this is going to be a short review, but I don't have much criticism for you, since you did this so wonderfully! Events moved along a little too ...

    Sep 25, 2011
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Mathematics

    Ummm...I love the mood you're projecting, but the poem itself, though I can see it's meant to be vague, is a little TOO vague... Oh, how I love introcet weather ...

    Sep 25, 2011
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Wanting to end it all

    Woah, there. This is a good, strong poem. I love how you describe this frustration towards the dad, and the inner pain, as well as the pain from the injury ...

    Sep 25, 2011
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: Virus irruption

    I think that the beginning telling the brother's age could be left out, or could be introduced in a different way. The furniture and lonely room could be better described ...

    Sep 8, 2011
  • Other Poetry Re: The before and after of slapping someone with a wet fish.

    This is really good! I love this poem and what you're doing! Keep writing stuff like this. I was instantly caught when I read this. But I have one question ...

    Sep 6, 2011
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Chasing nightmares

    Stuck in a classroom, surrounded by four walls. Where I learn of nightmares and down cliffs continually fall. Stuck in a nightmare kept in one place. Never can I leave ...

    Sep 5, 2011
  • Romantic Short Stories Re: Despite My Broken Heart

    I feel so sorry for Jade... You wrote this very well, and I feel as though I know Jade, and I wish I could've approached her and helped her because ...

    Sep 5, 2011
  • Romantic Short Stories Re: Everytime he smiles

    I love this short story! I feel as though you're making it like a poem, and change is good! The combination is refreshing. I think you repeat "Why doesn't he ...

    Sep 5, 2011
  • Other Poetry Re: Are You Listening?

    First off, what an awesome poem! I love the feelings you're giving off! I love how you contrast war and peace. I do have a few things to suggest, though. ...

    Sep 5, 2011


Some people are hourglass shaped, some people are apple shaped, some people are pear shaped, some people are even bean pole shaped, but if we’re not careful we all become banana shaped. This is your gentle posture reminder.
— Ranger