retrodisco666

Thanks for the comment :p I just wanted to say gay marriage goes that far back and it wasn't until the reformation of the church that it was actuall banned ...

I have no nitpicks for this piece so I shall not mark this as a review, however, I just wanted to say that this was beautiful to read. It has ...

No, by all means :)

Use is the present tense, used it the past tense. You just liase them when you say them outloud which is why it sounds like use :P

hmmmm, well I can see that in relation to how you use it in the first stanza. But at the end where you say tore the heart out of my ...

Wow indeed! Haha! I appreciate your comments but my point was more about creating a transgender perspective and the ending was intended to mirror the start. I was hoping to ...

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Again, sorry!

Note: This review has been deleted
I have no idea how this has posted three times! So sorry!

It was about a girl who was on life support; and in tes Of form and what not well I wrote this four years ago ;)

Hey :) Thanks for the review :) My sort of concept was so that he, (well I), have all these experiences in my head, he is concious of them and ...

Thank you so much! I really appreciate this :)

Hey I appreciate your comments:) I think that's just my Style :) I quite like the choppiness myself and the enjambement but that's just me :)

Just from the top of my head haha

Ah I see now :) then I'd perhaps suggests not capatilising the m in my so it looks like one complete sentence :)

Thanks so much for the review :) the change of point of view was intentional :) like she has no more strength to speak I herself. And I appreciate the ...