Counting Hay

The count grew
Even as few went away
All of us cordially invited
I must have surely miscounted each
like illimitable strands of hay
We quietly wait, the order
of the magistrate- Speak
For finally the Judge returns to me
My fate

Hey!

I really like this-- its one of those poems where you dont understand every phrase, but you can link the overall message to something in your mind. Its very clever

Just one thing-- i noticed you managed to steer clear of cliches rather well...until the last line :S. I dont know- maybe it fits, but i hate cliches so i always pickk them out fate is an overused subject in writing, and i think using alternatives like "conscience" (random example- couldnt think of many ) make a piece sound more genuine.

Really nice piece

Ella
XOX

I like it, i really like the way it sound when read out loud to.