The Outcast:C2: Sunny Days

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ShadowKnight155
Gender Male
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Wed Apr 20, 2011 2:50 pm
ShadowKnight155 says... · Wed Apr 20, 2011 2:50 pm
TOC: topic79659.html
----------------------------
I like the sunny days
When the warm rays shine.

The water of a hose
and squirtguns.

Mommy makes us drinks
for me and my friend.

Kelsey.

We play with doggy
make forts with our toys.

It's why I love 'em sunny days.

But for every sunny day,
_a cloud hangs over.

Sooner or Later.
Last edited by ShadowKnight155 on Thu Apr 21, 2011 2:40 pm, edited 3 times in total.
By nature, all language is flawed.

"Peace cannot be kept by force, it can only be achieved by understanding," - Albert Einstein
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lele253isme
Gender None specified
Points 1245
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Wed Apr 20, 2011 3:13 pm
lele253isme says... · Wed Apr 20, 2011 3:13 pm
Pretty much sums up what I think when I go outside. I love the last three lines.
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VousEsEtonnant
Gender Female
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Wed Apr 20, 2011 6:15 pm
VousEsEtonnant says... · Wed Apr 20, 2011 6:15 pm
Well then. This is really good. I think the only agitating thing is the first part. The sun is repeated, and it dulls the opening. Otherwise its good. Keep me posted on when you submit the rest. I wanna read it all.
"And when you're out there,
without care, yeah,
I was out of touch!
But it wasn't because I didn't know enough,
I just knew too much."
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Some people are hourglass shaped, some people are apple shaped, some people are pear shaped, some people are even bean pole shaped, but if we’re not careful we all become banana shaped. This is your gentle posture reminder.
— Ranger