It would be my microphone, and I would be the greatest singer ever. It would also be my guitar and a single drumstick, because having two is overrated.
Alcohol, Tobacco, & Firearms should be a convenience store, not a government agency.
I would definitely have used it as a sword and pretend I'm in this other world fighting creatures to rescue someone like a prince. Or I'd pretend I'm transported somewhere using our fort like in the Magic Tree House Books and fight off a T-Rex with the stick.
I would be a band conductor. And I would wave my baton (stick) around furiously, trying to get the elephants (which obviously make up the band) attentions. xD
The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically. Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education. — Martin Luther King, Jr.