Let Us Write

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Let us write a melody and sing it together in song,
Let us move to a new beat and then dance along.

We shall write a sonnet an ode to good fortune,
All of us shall write a beautiful love poem,
and we all will laugh in tune.

-M.H. Darling
Pain is beautiful, when you feel pain you know you're alive. -Criss Angel




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This is not a poem you read everyday, I found a message about peace and living in harmony in it.

In the first two lines, the rhyme seems effortless, but the rhythm seems a little off.

kitrosemon13 wrote:Let us write a melody and sing it together in song,
Let us move to a new beat and then we'll dance along.


In the second set of lines, I think the first line should be broken into two. It flows better.

Keep writing! :D




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If this is not yours... I dont advise you post it on here. It is not your own work. Thus, its note really allowed.

Unless it is yours, then tell me and I will aplogize for being stupid. XD

Im not actually sure where you'd post other peoples reviews... :/
Alot of the time, im on here using my PS3 & my trusty usb keyboard.
Dont expect much fancy quoting blocks... I shall do what I can. ;)




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No, I wrote this by myself. (: I do not copy others, I think it is a bit trashy.
Pain is beautiful, when you feel pain you know you're alive. -Criss Angel




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Points 14535
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Sorry :)

M.H.Darling sounded like an author I knew!
Alot of the time, im on here using my PS3 & my trusty usb keyboard.
Dont expect much fancy quoting blocks... I shall do what I can. ;)




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what first got me to read this was your title, no offense but i was let down.
you could do a lot better.



You walk into this room at your own risk, because it leads to the future, not a future that will be but one that might be. This is not a new world, it is simply an extension of what began in the old one. It has patterned itself after every dictator who has ever planted the ripping imprint of a boot on the pages of history since the beginning of time. It has refinements, technological advances, and a more sophisticated approach to the destruction of human freedom. But like every one of the super states that preceded it, it has one iron rule: logic is an enemy and truth is a menace.
— Rod Serling