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Just Close you eyes

Fall_Into_The_Sky · 2008-01-23T21:24:26Z

[pre]"Just Close Your Eyes" -- title of poem Just close your eyes And go to sleep Live to see another day To see the rains of may Why do we worship those in power? They only bring destruction and cower Can't we stop the madness? Save the people from the sadness Life needs to go on not end We need to remember our friends Count our treasures not our pockets Keep our memories as our lockets Some days are spectacular Some are ordinary Life is full of love and loss Your future should not be tossed When life seems so lost Hang in Don't give up Just close your eyes And go to sleep Live to see another day To see the rains of may One day you will meet The person God laid at your feet And he will take the pain away Make you want to live another day So Just close your eyes And go to sleep Live to see another day To see the rains of may[/pre]

Kelsey Logan

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Points 890

Reviews 38

Sat Feb 23, 2008 6:12 pm

Kelsey Logan says... · Sat Feb 23, 2008 6:12 pm

that was really good. i totally admire people who can write poetry, especially good poetry, because i'm severely terrible at it.

so keep up the good work!

KTL

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scribblingquill

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Points 890

Reviews 62

Sat Feb 23, 2008 6:54 pm

scribblingquill says... · Sat Feb 23, 2008 6:54 pm

i like the "memories as our lockets" part.

Although I think you could take away one of the repetitive parts to give more of an impact when you do it at the end but thats the only improvement i can think of.

xx

Is this bass REALLY strong enough?

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Besides, if you want perfection, write a haiku. Anything longer is bound to have some passages that don't work as well as they might.
— Philip Pullman

Just Close you eyes

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