Sorrow

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The wolf howls a celestial song of sorrow
As the sun preaches a multi-hued farewell.
I wait in mourning for night to draw near
But all that comes is everlasting hell.
Last edited by crewgurl93 on Sun Sep 16, 2007 2:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Goth-Hippie?!




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What you have is great but it's much too short to be a complete poem. Your imagery is pretty, you have a good vocabulary and the rhyme is effective but the punctuation needs to be added and you need to extend it. A few suggestions -

The wolf howls a celestial song of sorrow
As the sun preaches a multi-hued farewell.
I wait in mourning for night to draw near
But all that comes is everlasting hell.
Writing Gooder

~Previously KittyKatSparklesExplosion15~

The light shines brightest in the darkest places.




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Yes, this is very good, but very short...maybe alittle too short.

The rhyme is also very good :) Basically everything said above.
So's your face




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I think you have some interesting vocabulary and imagery but there wasn't really enough punctuation and I didn't really get it. Whether that was because it was so short I don't know. Also the title didn't seem to fit. I think it needs some more work =/
“Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave.”



I was flummoxed by fractious Franny's decision to abrogate analgesics for the moribund victims of the recent conflagration. Of course, to display histrionics was discretionary, but I did so anyways, implicating a friend in my drama to make the effect cumulative. I think a misanthrope would have a prosaic appellation, perhaps one related to autonomy and the rejection of anthropocentrism. I think they wouldn't think much of the prominence of watching the coagulation of tea to prognosticate future malevolent events, not even if those events were related to jurisprudence.
— Spearmint