Published October 6, 2026
INTRODUCTION
Greetings, dear humans! My name is Professor Mash, and I teach at the prestigious Academy of Potatoes, the most famous school for young potatoes in all of Potatoland. I have recently had a conversation with one of my earlier pupils, HMMHhehe, who expressed her concern on a point that I had not been aware of previously. She remarked that, having spend some time amongst human users of this website, it had become apparent to her that none of you knew even the most remote detail about our wonderful and grand country!
This is, indeed, concerning. Were I to ask a cucumber, or even a brussel sprout, they would immediatly be able to summarize for me the most basic information on Potatoland. However, were I to ask a human, the most they would be able to do would be to stutter something irrelevant, completely unfounded or untrue, such as 'I don't know the names of every attraction park on Earth!' or 'Um... a piece of land with potatoes?'
This is not due to a lack of intelligence or spirit. It is simply due to ignorance, and therefore must be both tolerated and fixed. For if the school curriculums of cucumbers, brussel sprouts and many more cover the basics of Potatoland, I have not - to this day - been able to find a single educational institution for humans where this subject is covered other than as a distasteful 'joke'.
It is why I, Professor Mash, have decided to create a simple Guide to Potatoland - in partenership with HMMHhehe - to instruct ignorant humans on the basics of history in Potatoland. Once you have read the integrality of this guide, consider yourself ready to maybe contemplate the prospect of a visit to Potatoland.
...Enjoy!
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142,322 Literary Works • 677,257 Reviews
Hello HMMHhehe! It's the magnificent AJ here for a review! I saw this in the spotlight and so, naturally I had to read it. This is a really funny little essay/short story about Potatoland and I really hope there's a part two...
Okay, really efficient way of introducing our characters. I do wish that we could learn a little bit more about this HMMHhehe. She sounds awfully interesting. Dr. Mash immediately is unique and has a really solid voice.
Well, this is rather true. That's what I would have said. This is also really funny. I laughed at what the humans would say. I do think that the last sentence is a bit of a run on. You could split it into two sentences.
Well, humans are a little unintelligent... Also, you keep bringing back the brussel sprouts and cucumbers. I'm assuming they'll be important later on?
My only critique. The double ellipsis. You have them after Potatoland and before Enjoy. Cut one of them.
Overall, this is a really funny piece that I really enjoyed. I couldn't find much to critique beyond little grammar mistakes.
Keep on living and writing!
AJ
Yaaaaaay thank you! =D
Professor Mash also sends his thanks of course.
Yes, I wonder who that is... XD
Thank you!
helo. um... let's see here...
number one, I am not ignorant. Thank you, I know a great deal about potatoes. In fact, I eat them daily. To be real here though, I think this is very well written. The comparison of other vegetables knowing about it and humans not is funny. I definitely had a giggle at this. I will definitely read the entire thing when you finish!
good day fine sir,
kiki
Thank you!
Professor Mash sends his thanks too XD
Hello there, potato! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!
Shalt we commence with the wretched S’more?
Top Graham Cracker - This is an introduction to the guide of Potatoland. Now, I’m not a human, but I’ll admit that I know nothing about Potatoland, so when I saw this, I knew that I had to read it to inform myself!
Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - I have no recommendations to make as of right now, but if you would like to edit this, you may.
Chocolate Bar - I like that Professor Mash makes it a point that cucumbers and brussel sprouts know about Potatoland, but humans don’t. It shows just how much the humans don’t know about Potatoland. I also like that he sounds rather educated, it seems that he has an extensive history on Potatoland.
Closing Graham Cracker - Overall, a lovely introduction! I’ll be certain to read more of this guide so that I can correct my ignorance on Potatoland! I have enjoyed reading this and…
I wish you a fabulous day/night! ^v^
Tysmmmm!!! =D
Professor Mash also sends his thanks XD
yw!