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by deleted7

Published May 6, 2011

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Comments & reviews · 4
User avatar
blackstar
Review
blackstar wrote a review Review · May 31, 2011

true, I hate it when ppl try to change me or say something about me. I am always gonna be just the way I am ppl!! There ain't nothing you can do to change me! :D

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Stori
Comment
Stori commented Comment · May 30, 2011

Nicely done, this. There isn't much else to say.

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ArcticMonkey
Review
ArcticMonkey wrote a review Review · May 7, 2011

Hello NafeCT! Here to review(:

Overall, I do like the general idea of this little piece. I mean loving youself for who you are is the way to go, and that whole 'I don't give a crap about what anybody thinks of me' attitude can be really helpful sometimes. I also like how it's quite short, and it's from your perspective. However, I do believe this piece elongs in 'Other' rather than 'General Articles', but you might disagree with me on that. And I also like you're repitition.

What I didn't like was how everything was sort of worded, like with all the exclamations marks and the capital letters. I really think that this piece has a lot of potential because I really like this idea of one voice. It's actually quite hard to critique a piece like this. I think you need to get rid of all random words in capitals if you want this to be serious. This almost seems like a speech if I'm honest, if that's what it is then you can shout out those things in capital letters.

Although I did say I like the repitition of this piece, there's something that still bothers me about it. Who is your target audience? I mean I'm just really confused. Anyway, just remember, that deep down there are actually many people who like and dislike things that people might find a bit weird, so you're not the only one. So, I'm just thinking that piece lacks a bit of originality. I think that you could maybe make this into a poem? And use metaphores for all your feelings to make it more exciting or something.


Spoiler
Nitpicks:
I have dozens of flaws. Thousands. Millions, even. But if I had a choice to be anyone else, I’d still choose me. Heard that one before, huh? Yes, I honestly like myself that much.

I’m queer and I don’t ever, EVER want to change; so if you can’t live with that then you know where the exit door from my life is.


Hope I helped, see you around!
~ArcticMonkey x

User avatar
Gheala
Review
Gheala wrote a review Review · May 6, 2011

Lol. I liked it! It's amazing when you come to realize that you're beautiful the way you are, right?
Your style is very nice, and I loved how you listed all the reasons you like yourself the way you are. They made me smile and I think you just made my day.
Thank you!



It had a perfectly round door like a porthole, painted green, with a shiny yellow brass knob in the exact middle. The door opened on to a tube-shaped hall like a tunnel: a very comfortable tunnel without smoke, with panelled walls, and floors tiled and carpeted, provided with polished chairs, and lots and lots of pegs for hats and coats—the hobbit was fond of visitors. The tunnel wound on and on, going fairly but not quite straight into the side of the hill —The Hill, as all the people for many miles round called it—and many little round doors opened out of it, first on one side and then on another.
— JRR Tolkien