Published March 27, 2026
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Hey there, fatherfig! I was going through my bookmarks for something short for the day and I came across this. Hope you don't mind, now let's get into the review~
Personally, I loved the use of these words to describe death! There's just one problem- they contradict. There was nothing wrong with premeditated, untill you said it isn't planned. Because I searched my suspicion and it indeed means 'planned in advance'. So as good as these two lines were, you can't really use them both.
To me, it breaks the poetic trance the previous had me in, just because it is too literal. Nothing bad and just my own preference, but I thought to point out that the impact dipped here.
Such a creative thought, and all the more true. They have the riches to plan their fate even after death, and that highlights the disparity between them and the poor / nature. My favorite lines so far!
It just keeps getting better and better! The honesty is just so refreshing, and I can definitely see a glimpse of the first stanza's last line again (its simplicity) again. To know that you're waning, and something you've worked for exaggerates the blow is so shattering, and you portray that impeccably.
Ahhh what a mic drop statement, sir! Really draws out the selfish hypocrisy of the world. Though I'm curious- don't both of these lose and not benefit from our ultimate death? The longer you live, the longer you pay for medicines and insurance. So they want you to live and not die? I'm just a little confused here, I can be dumb like that!
The gay sass is very prominent here, I'm hooked. It sounds like the subject is reluctant to believe this apparent conspiracy theory, so they leave the final decision upto interpretation. Quite a satisfying end.
Thank you for sharing, fig! I quite enjoyed this, hope to review for you again someday~
Love, Alex
Thank you, though, that first bit is contradictory on purpose just like the American health industry!
Wow that didn't cross my mind, the symbolism is impressive!
this is brilliant!!!
Depth. Imagine A System Being A Reason For Your Death. To watch, to look, to think, to know that we wil die. So to be wise enough to plan for death. While We Fight To Live Long Enough To Surpass Regret. With The Medicine We Get. And The Insurance Which Our Lives On We Bet.
I Mean. Premeditated. That's Deep. Imagining A Labyrinth Where At Every Dead End Is A Hole.
PEACE✌️ ☮️
🎭
Oh, that's such a beautiful way of portraying this subject! I love how you portrayed the sheer agony and irony of the way the company does NOT, actually, focus on people... It's really a pretty way to call out such a cruel system, and your poetic structure and wordings are AMAZING to show off the problem! I like the lack of uppercase letters, it feels like it can switch up the tone a bit, by smoothing down how ppl talk and stuff,,, beautiful work! I loved this!
Hello!
I first noticed how sharp and direct this poem feels. There’s a kind of controlled bluntness to it that suits the subject matter really well. The opening line especially, 'death is premeditated.', immediately sets up a strong philosophical stance, and it pulled me in right away. In terms of interpretation, I read this poem as grappling with the tension between death as something inevitable and natural, versus something that becomes systematized and exploited by human institutions. The speaker seems aware that death itself isn’t planned in a literal sense, but society behaves as if it is--preparing for it/ packaging it. That shift from existential idea to critique of systems--insurance, medicine--feels like the core movement of the poem.
I really adore how the word 'orchestrated' works in the second line. It softens and complicates what premeditated means--like death isn’t consciously planned, but there’s still a structure and machinery around it. That idea carries really nicely into the middle section with :
There’s something a bit unsettling about how normalized all of this is. The list format almost mimics the very thing it’s describing--a checklist for dying. I think that’s a really interesting structural choice.
One of the lines that stood out most to me was :
I figure this suggests a kind of closed loop where care and profit are entangled, which ties back nicely to the idea of death being 'orchestrated' . I like the shift into irony here and into the ending stanzas. They feel quieter but also more cutting in a way. In terms of themes, I see this poem exploring inevitability, control, and also the commodification of mortality. What I find particularly compelling is how it suggests that death itself isn’t planned, and the systems around it make it engineered.
A couple of small thoughts/ questions :
1. The transition from the more abstract opening to the very concrete critique of insurance feels intentional, but I did feel it was sudden. Do you see that jump as part of the poem’s effect, or would you consider adding a bridging image or line?
2. I really like the list structure in the middle--I wonder if you might lean into that even more, e.g. extending or fragmenting it further, o heighten that checklist for dying feeling?
Overall: I really enjoyed this! It’s concise but carries a lot of weight, and the tone shift from philosophical to critical/ ironic gives it a nice arc.
I hope this helps! xx
I really like this poem. this poem is about death and how everyone is expecting it and companies capitalize off the sick and injuried instead of focusing on healing them and how every is told that the big industries have our best heart at mind but in reality they don't and are just trying to take as much money as they can from the people right? that's how I interpreted it
yea c: