Roses revived(the rejection)

by littlezeus92

  • Poetry
  • Lyrical

Published December 21, 2007

the author has deleted his account

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
jenni321
Comment
jenni321 commented Comment · Dec 23, 2007

I love your poem! there are a few puncuation, capitalization, and spelling errors, but the message is really deep and sweet. keep posting, i'd love to read more!


jenni321

User avatar
spiritblackwolf2705
Review
spiritblackwolf2705 wrote a review Review · Dec 21, 2007

Okay! Good job, the rhymes were awesome.

Now I must point out some things that need to be fixed:

You need to capitalize! And you need to use puncuation!

and you cant but these roses


I think 'but' is supposed to be 'buy'

and if you look hard
you might have some luck
you could find it growing wildly
and have it with a little pluck


The last stanza sounded a little choppy to me, but that's just my opinion.

(Not trying to be harsh. Overall, good job.



I say Wolf, for all wolves are not of the same sort; there is one kind with an amenable disposition – neither noisy, nor hateful, nor angry, but tame, obliging and gentle, following the young maids in the streets, even into their homes. Alas! Who does not know that these gentle wolves are of all such creatures the most dangerous!
— Charles Perrault