Before I Died

by soulidium

Published October 16, 2010

I am buried as you cry
You think I hated you, but it was a lie
I always loved you and you never knew

Before I died I wanted to tell you
But this is what came to my mind
You never loved me, Just desperate
And lonely but now I see the truth
and wish i could have seen it sooner

But now as I look down on you
I wish I could have told you but
it's too late
I tore your heart out and threw it away

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
emalily
Review
emalily wrote a review Review · Oct 16, 2010

soulidium wrote:I am buried as you cry
You think I hated you, but it was a lie
I always loved you and you never knew

Before I died I wanted to tell you
But this is what came to my mind
You never loved me, Just desperate
And lonely but now I see the truth
and wish i could have seen it sooner

But now as I look down on you
I wish I could have told you but
it's too late
I tore your heart out and threw it away


I have tried to fix your spelling mistakes etc in red
I'm a bit confused by this poem and I'm not really sure what it's about so I can't really make any comments about how you could improve it because I'm sure you know what you are trying to communicate.

Good luck,
Emalily

User avatar
Funkymomo
Comment
Funkymomo commented Comment · Oct 16, 2010

It's interesting- YOu had a lot of simple spelling and grammar mistakes though-you might want to reread it and fix those.



"You, who have all the passion for life that I have not? You, who can love and hate with a violence impossible to me? Why you are as elemental as fire and wind and wild things..."
— Gone With the Wind