I want chocolate for breakfast
And ice cream for dinner
I want a new toy
A Barbie Ken
And the rad red bike
In the display window
I want to stay up all night
watching movies
Rom-coms and horrors,
the R-rated ones
I want to skip school
and go to The Fair
to kiss and piss
behind the tents
I want to steal a ruby ring
Put it on my girl,
run with her to NYC
from the Old Man's paddle
I want to be in Hollywood
drinking Smirnoff, eating cake
On the front of Confidential
dining with Hybris
I want to watch birds
throw stones at them
build nests
grow wings
I want more
More
Just because
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I never intended to be a poet, but I keep writing poetry. Any reviews and criticisms are greatly appreciated.
Its quite good btw
Hi there! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!
Am M🌕🌕N. Not thr one on the sky ok! Yay!!!
Top Graham Cracker - What I Know
Firstly it was so good.I enjoyed the playful and rebellious nature of this poem. The repetition of "I want" makes the speaker's endless desires stand out. I particularly liked the contrast between childish wishes and more daring fantasies. The bird stanza caught my attention because of its unusual imagery.and also i liked how the title makes me so curious.
Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - Room for Improvements
I got no suggestions for now yo.
Chocolate Bar - Highlights of the Piece
I like the ending sooooo much the bird stanza. My favorite line is...
Closing Graham Cracker - Closing Thoughts
Overall it was so beautiful easy to read and understand. Keep writing!! Thank you for sharing. Yay~~