Fragility

Text version:

Spoiler

Fragile, breathing, still.
I have learned, once again, that my mind is the deepest cave of helplessness.
I have rejected the world, focused on what I considered lasting,
I thought I knew depth when I relived it all.
Watching myself want something, someone,
Wanting to be wanted in a world that I know will end.
I believe that I chose this world, I thought it was only to suffer,
To allow myself to be tormented and torn.
In my suffering, I seek a cure. In death, I sought life.
And still, I want to smell the end, closer, harsher,
I want to feel its breath. I want to shatter my own fragility.
In my stillness, I had nothing to offer,
I could only seek what my own body could not give.
I could only wait for my breath to return and my bones to mend themselves,
I could only believe in time, in structure, in life, in nothing.
Let the marrow in my bones guide my faith in everything,
Because I no longer trust good or evil. I no longer live in this world.
I crave fragility. I could break with my own breath.

You can review in the form of a poem response, or however you like.

Hello!

I really like this poem!!! It somehow seems to rhyme even without rhyming - I think because you wrote it so well that it has a kind of melody to it =D
Also maybe because each line ends with a consonant (in the sound) - except for one, but it's a y? Hm I don't know, anyways it sounds great, and I like that rhyming doesn't really matter here, it's more... free?

Fragile, breathing, still.

Ooooooh this can have a lot of meanings if the reader wants to imagine them! For example, fragile but still breathing; fragile breathing, all is still; all is/I am fragile, breathing and still; I'm still breathing in a fragile way, etc. etc. I really like that! =D

I have rejected the world, focused on what I considered lasting,
I thought I knew depth when I relived it all.

Huh. I need a little bit of time for my poor mortal brain to process this crazy thinking! So... you did not consider the whole world lasting, and you focused on what you thought was. Ok, I understand now - and when you relived (it all?) you thought you knew depth...? So you thought that you were wise, or something, after going through a lot? Hmm this is very interesting to think about, because it is a bit hard for me to understand right away - but that makes it good, because it brings the reader (me) to think about the poem, with a bonus that they (me) remember it longer! =D

In my suffering, I seek a cure. In death, I sought life.

Oh I like that this is kind of repetition, but also not because the words are different! Like a mirror maybe, because you see the same thing but switched around??

I crave fragility. I could break with my own breath.

Ooooooooooh this is cool: the poem ends with "fragility" in the end line, and it started with the word "Fragile"!!!! I really like that and it probably also has an impact on the reader?? Just to say that I noticed =D
Also, I don't want you to break with your own breath because you seem like a very nice person and you make great poems and I generally don't want anyone to break ToT
So please take care of yourself and thank you so much for writing/posting this!!!
Have a wonderful day

-HMMHhehe the potato