I wish I could live those years again, the time when I was ten
That was the time I felt truly free,
Running through forests barefoot,
Climbing up trees
Those were the days I slew imaginary dragons,
Fought massive giants
And built fairy wagons
Those were the nights filled with stars,
When I could travel to magical places,
It was never too hard
Those were the nights my sleep was filled with sweet dreams,
In them grew golden flowers,
And flowed crystal clear streams
Those were the mornings filled with adventure and fun,
When I was free to run outside,
Watched over by the rising sun
Those are the years I would give anything to live again,
Times I wish would have had no end
The time when I was ten.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
142,535 Literary Works • 678,373 Reviews
Hello, Noirmont here to review!
This is a very sweet piece. There is, of course, a certain innocence one associates with childhood that makes it immediately nostalgic. I believe that even when one experiences strife during that period, there's a longing present for a time of decreased responsibility, naïveté, what have you. Particularly as I've gotten older and better acquainted with the world I've experienced that longing -- even when my memories of childhood aren't necessarily pleasant, they represent an era within my life in which I had insurmountable hope and a zest for living. As adults we must attempt to remember our curiosity and capacity for play; let us not be too mopey in the face of this miracle of life.
I'm glad you were able to tap into your nostalgia. I think it's very effective here! Your imagery is clear, as well. I can picture these dreams as if I were having them myself. This piece emits this sort of golden light that I find not only comforting, but also impressively in line with the scene you're painting within the stanzas. You've captured the essence of joy during this time so well. And yet there's a sadness, I feel, just in the idea that we can never quite retrieve that moment of time again. That's evident as well for me as a reader. I think you've painted it with a great sense of honesty here. Good work!
I look forward to reading more from you.
Must have been an amazing childhood you had growing up (I'm jealous 🤸♂️).
Down to my review,
I like how you've captured your childhood as a time of freedom and boundless imagination. The imagery of fighting imaginary dragons, climbing trees, barefoot adventures and travelling to magical places gives us a glimpse into that beautiful world through the eyes of a child.
I also like the repetition of "Those were the days", "Those were the nights" and "Those were the mornings". It gives the poem a nostalgic rhythm, almost like someone flipping through old photographs and reliving each memory.
The poem does a good job of conveying its longing, especially in the way it returns to the age of ten at the end. There's something bittersweet about wishing to revisit a time that, no matter how much we desire it, we can never quite get back.
Be glad you were fortunate enough to have such beautiful memories to look back on.