You're an angel and a devil in my head
Kind one minute then the next wishing me dead
Who are you, I'll never know
You're the angel and a saint
Making me feel safe
I let down my walls
Then the devil shows it's face
Making me run back into my fortress of sorrow
You used to be so kind
Now you're my demise
I'll tear myself apart
To fit within the box, you need me to squeeze in
I need to be wise
Now your the devil
And now you don't care
Now all my scars mean nothing
Because you're not here anymore
And I'm not jealous
But I want the girl
I used to know
The angel who you used to be
Not the devil
Who took over your head
I won't face the devil
so I'll leave you behind
finally out of my head
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I love the imagery you used, but you also muddled the idea here
In the beginning you give the idea (that part aside) that the person you are talking to is innocent and good, but in the middle they are bad, and in the end, as seen here,
it is tied together beautifully in that you see how they changed and it hurt you.
I also love how it it ends with the last three lines
although you could have done well to make the last line rhyme or have a similar rhythm but I do still like how it ends. Great job expressing how you feel and I hope that you find a way to face your devil or find peace and safety to keep your from thinking of it.
Thank you for your advice :> this one is definitely not one of my best works so I agree with your critique and I'll try to fix these problems with future works. Thank you again for taking the time to write this review, it means a lot!
- Sullen
This seems similar to one of the ones you showed me before,but I can't remember. My brain ain't braining right now.But I'm gonna review this
I get the feeling that you're talking about how it is in your head. But I think everyone is like this,but have different ways of showing it
These lines are so understandable. Nobody wants to face the devil