Do you know the sorrows of my heart?
the soft sorrows
the screaming bliss
as comes on tomorrows
just like your kiss
you’ve left already
without looking back
I’ve tried to keep steady
but you’ve left a track
The dimple in your chin
the lover in your heart
the color of your skin
and I wonder where to start
It was never me
thats what hurts
and it won’t let me be
whenever I see those desserts
you were mine
though it was never true
and it felt like a vine
out of the blue
so here I am
staring at the shelf
you were my cam
and I’m sitting here thinking to myself;
Do you know the sorrows of my heart?
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142,241 Literary Works • 677,072 Reviews
Wow, this is just WOW.
I love this poem a lot, partly because I can relate to it easily, but also because I love the language and metaphors that come with this.
Oh sorry me, forgot to introduce myself....
You may not know me, but people mainly call me Queenie . Some people like to call me Q because it's cooler but it's your choice!
These parts stuck with me:
I adore the imagery in this poem; I can clearly feel that you are trying to forget the person you love so deeply. Heartbreak is something almost anyone can relate to, including me
Overall, great poem. Never stop writing!
Queenie
Like a dagger to my heart 😭✌️
I love the heartbrokenness that this poem just radiates. (Since nobody asked I am going to state that I love these types of poems).
I will add a little tiny bit of criticism but don't take it to heart.
Just this opening part confused me slightly, which is basically just the "as comes on tomorrows".
Like I said please dont take this to heart, I do love how "The soft sorrows, the screaming bliss" are almost like two opposites that somehow blended very nicely.
I love the imagery in this. I can just imagine the narrator trying to forget this person, but their memory is still fresh in the narrators mind (If im picking that up correctly, ignore me
This part I like alot aswell. Pondering on it and inserting my own experiences into it has also made me like it more. It just tells a story the more you think about it, like you try to push forward and stay strong, but a reminder of them is still right in front of the narrator, almost tauntingly ("But you've left a track")
Good piece! Keep up the good work!