Gravity loved the moon and never once said so.
It just pulled, softly, every night, at her tide colored hem,
and the ocean, being a poor keeper of secrets,
rose each time to tell her, and then fell back, ashamed.
The moon, who had been lonely since the first dark,
circled and circled without ever arriving,
because to arrive is to end, and she preferred
to be almost held than to be finished.
Stay, said Gravity, in a voice that was only weight.
I can't, she said, but look what I do when I go:
I make the water dance. I make the night a thing with edges.
I make you feel like a hand that has just missed a hand.
And that was how the two of them agreed
to keep the distance exactly as wide as a promise,
so that the world could have its tides,
and the lovers could keep their long, luminous falling.
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Maybe some kinds of love were never meant to end in arrival. Maybe the distance is what makes the longing beautiful.<3
I neeeed my team tortoise to beat tikaa so helo hira!!
The thing that popped out to me the most in this was the italicized stanza, when Gravity was speaking. I really liked how Gravity and the Moon were lovers, in the place of traditional things like the sky and the earth, or the sun and the clouds. That detail stood out to me as well. Overall I found this really thrilling to read and calming. See you again soon!
~ Kiki the dino
honestly turning physics into a love story usually ends up super cheesy, but this actually works without being dramatic 🔅
the ocean part at the start is really neat—having the water act like a snitch that accidentally gives away gravity’s secret and then pulls back embarrassed gives it a cool vibe right away 🐟 and "tide colored hem" is just a really nice line.
gravity’s characterization is super solid too ☁
describing its speech as "a voice that was only weight" makes an invisible force feel real without needing over-the-top lines 🔅
it stays steady and quiet, which fits the whole concept 🐟
the ending ties it up really well ☀ framing the distance as an agreement "as wide as a promise" makes a lot of sense—they have to stay apart so the world can have tides and the whole balance stays intact ☁
super thoughtful and understated 🔅 really good write 🐟
I really loved this. The way you turned gravity and the moon into two lovers who can never truly reach each other is so beautiful. “I make the water dance” and “a hand that has just missed a hand” especially stayed with me. It feels like a poem about loving someone while accepting that distance is part of the love itself. The ending is so quietly heartbreaking, because they choose to remain apart so the world can have its tides. There’s something almost magical about how every image connects back to that idea. I genuinely felt good reading this—like a sad, beautiful little story told through poetry. this is honestly such a lovely piece.